As when you stop and really think about it, a first date is a bit like going in for your first day of school. You have butterflies in your stomach, you’re nervous and you really don’t know what to expect, as you don’t know anybody.

Even though I haven’t gone on many first dates myself, when I think back to the few I have gone on, it takes me right back to those feeling of nervousness, almost feeling sick at some points, sweating in the uber, thinking have I sprayed enough perfume, does my makeup look nice, will he like me - so I totally understand the struggle. 

But if you’re wondering how some people combat these fears, The Independent reported that, 39% of singles admitted that they have an alcoholic drink beforehand to help calm their nerves’.

However don’t worry if you’re not a drinker I am sure there are some more T-Toal ways to get rid of your pre date jitters! 

So with the general consensus highlighting that first dates can be a bit nerve racking it leads me onto the top five ways in which we can combat this (especially when dating online.)

1. Being honest/ Dating profiles

When dating, especially online, the first thing someone will see is your dating profile, so the best thing to do is ensure that you are honest and truthful, as first impressions matter. 

This is because these days anything can give someone the ick or cause them to swipe left, so if you lead with honesty you have a fighting chance at finding the one, and actually making it out onto a date. 

With statistics reporting that 1 in 3 relationships now begin online, your dating profile is crucial in ensuring your date's comfortability. As these are the limited nuggets of information that they’ll be able to hold onto when trying to prepare themselves for your meeting.

So if you’re dishonest or fragmenting the truth then this could really jeopardise things. 

2. Location

The location of a first date is arguably the most important factor which will ensure whether your date feels safe and comfortable when meeting you for the first time or not!

This is because if your date suggested meeting in an abandoned warehouse, alarm bells would definitely be ringing, as it’s not giving safe dating vibes at all.

This is why if you were somewhere more public and familiar you may be more inclined to actually go.

Statistics have definitely backed this up as according to reports, 65% of people have voted that restaurant is their ideal date activity and location. Reinforcing the idea that the location of your date can play a very big role in both the success of your date and also whether or not it actually goes ahead.

3. Respecting boundaries

When going on a first date, the reality is that you are really meeting a stranger.

Therefore you have limited information to go off surrounding what they like, what they don't like, what makes them comfortable and what makes them uncomfortable, which highlights why it is crucial that you are socially aware when it comes to reading the room.

As if your date is giving off signals that they are uncomfortable or putting subtle boundaries in place, it is important that you respect them.

With reports stating that singles only have a 10% chance of getting a second date, it really conveys why it is so important to ensure that you and your date are in tune and both feeling comfortable with each other. 

4. Take your time

This may seem like a rogue one, but taking your time is so important when it comes to dating, as like singer & songwriter Leon Thomas says in his hit song Mutt, ‘She said take your time, what's the rush?” and it's so true as what really is the rush?

With reports finding that 44% of Gen Z Hinge daters have very little dating experience, adopting a slower approach when you're dating for the first time is a great way to ensure you don't get overwhelmed, and I strongly believe this applies on dates too.

As rushing in with too many compliments and leaning in for a kiss can be too much for some people resulting in no second date and maybe even a drink to the face.

So slow down, take it easy and get to know each other at a slower pace. 

5. Move on if rejected

Finally if for whatever reason your date doesn't go well, the best thing to do is not to push it but to move on. This is because with nearly a quarter of online daters experiencing digital stalking - it sheds light on the dangers that could occur in real life.

Therefore if you are going to take any advice from this post today, if you're feeling someone but they are not feeling you don't worry, shake it off - as there are plenty more fish in the sea.

However if you are feeling cautious about going on a first date, Ask Angela is a perfect way to subtly get help if you need to leave or you’re not feeling the vibes, so definitely check out their page.

Credits:

• Marriage.Com:  https://www.marriage.com/advice/relationship/first-date-nervousness/#:~:text=Nearly%20every%20dater%20has%20faced,level%20of%20first%2Ddate%20nervousness. 
• Pew Research Centre: https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2023/02/02/key-findings-about-online-dating-in-the-u-s/
• The Independent: https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/dating/dating-first-date-confidence-valentines-b2281112.html
• Top10: https://www.top10.com/dating/first-date-etiquette-survey#:~:text='Let's%20Grab%20Something%20To%20Eat'&text=It%20may%20not%20come%20as,hitting%20a%20board%20game%20cafe 
• Fashion Journal: https://fashionjournal.com.au/life/slow-dating/#:~:text=Can%20anyone%20engage%20in%20slow,partners%2C%E2%80%9D%20Moe%20tells%20me. 
• Kaspersky: https://www.kaspersky.com/about/press-releases/nearly-a-quarter-of-online-daters-experience-digital-stalking 
• Ask Angela: https://askforangela.co.uk/