Why dating is more than finding a match.
By Sanchia Saunders
In this day and age when it comes to dating, a lot of singles get caught up on the number of likes they receive on Instagram, or the number of roses they receive on Hinge or the number matches that they receive on Tinder - that they unfortunately begin to lose sight of what they are are actually searching for.
I will be the first to put my hands up and say yes, I have fallen victim to this way of thinking one too many times. As if I’m not matching with the guys I like, or not getting roses sent to me on Hinge - dare I say I get a little chip on my shoulder - because yes I do.
Thankfully I’m not the only one, as
statistics from Forbes have found that,
“79% of Gen Z singles have reported dating app burnout” - conveying the idea that the dating system is flawed leaving loop holes for feelings like burnout and maybe even self doubt.
What is dating app burnout? What dating is actually about?
According to online dating giants Bumble, dating burnout can manifest in a variety of ways, but overall it boils down to a drained, despondent feeling.
One where you’re no longer having fun on dates, or even looking forward to meeting someone new.
You may feel like dating is a waste of time and start to disassociate from the idea of finding a partner - all together.
So with
Bumble
very much opening my eyes to the idea that I myself may in fact be experiencing dating burnout too - it poses the question of what is dating actually about?
What dating is actually about?
Traditional dating as we know it often refers to two people partaking in a number of social/ activity based outings, otherwise known as dates with the end goal of falling love, having babies and living happily ever after.
But in all serious dating especially as you get older is with the intent of finding a life partner and settling down.
However, when you actually take a step back and think about it, dating is about loving yourself enough first, and ensuring your cup is half full first, so you can then go out into the big wide world with the confidence and surety of opening up your heart to someone new.
Yes you read that, dating requires confidence.
This is because with,
1 in 5 women severely lacking confidence in themselves - it reinforces the confidence that it takes to even immerse yourself into the dating scene.
Faces of Humanity
Sands of Time
Beyond Boundaries
Graphics by: Ellie Hamilton Miller
If dating isn’t just about the matches, what is it about?
So as I briefly touched on earlier on in the post a lot of Gen Z singles are suffering from dating burnout, due to the fun and magic that once embraced the dating scene now starting to fade.
With singles becoming
consumed by superficial things
like likes and matches they no longer seek self gratification but the gratification from others instead.
With over
6 in every 10 women feeling negatively about their bodies, it really does shed light on why dating is a whole lot more than just the matches.
Instead it’s about feeling comfortable and confident within yourself so you are then able to go out and foster healthy platonic or romantic relationships.
It could be argued that dating is like a form of self care.
As you have to live, nurture and sometimes even find yourself first before, during and sometimes even after dating.
But what do you think - head to our
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